Embracing Your Fear
As a counsellor in private practice I have found the book Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway an extremely rewarding experience to read and a highly useful tool to help people.
I would highly recommend it to anyone. Whether you are struggling with a problem at the moment, or feel that life is good, you will get something from this book. Susan Jeffers inspires us with many active techniques and profound ideas that have helped millions of people to embrace their fears and move forward to a happier and healthier life.
Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway looks at the basic core of human fear:
- Fear of failing.
- Fear of succeeding.
- Fear of decisions.
- Fear of aging, of loss or of helplessness.
We see fear as something negative which we must endeavour to get rid of.
However this books fundamental principle is that your aim should not be to get rid of your fears.
Instead, you should feel your fear, but not let it stop you from doing things you really want to do.
In essence then it is about embracing your fear.
The book describes three levels of fear:
- The Fear of the actual event – for example losing your job.
- The fear, triggered by the first level – for example rejection (if being fired would make you feel rejected).
- The fear that you won’t be able to cope.
Susan Jeffers promotes the idea that if you knew in advance that you could cope then there would be nothing to fear – thus fear of being unable to cope is at the root of all fear.
Therefore the best way to manage your fear, isn’t to try and avoid situations or make your life safer – but instead to increase your faith in your abilities and coping mechanisms.
Susan Jeffers illustrates this point using several stories of people who have lessened their enjoyment of life in order to keep safe.
In doing so they don’t reduce their fear but in fact continue to live in everlasting fear. When some catastrophic event interfered with their reduced existence (say a bereavement), some of them found that they were forced to truly experience life, and that they could cope.
Susan Jeffers is a great proponent of the use of positivity as a way to reduce fear. Fell The Fear and Do It Anyway argues that you need to make a conscious effort to constantly train your thinking to be positive and let go of negativity.
As a counsellor I have recommended this book to countless clients who have gained great benefit from reading it and accessing the techniques described.
If you are struggling with your self esteem and lack of confidence counselling is a perfect way to help. A qualified counsellor can work alongside you, helping you to discuss your fears and learn new ways of being in your world. If you are interested in counselling in Weston-super-Mare, please click the link here to view my website.
http://www.npcounselling.co.uk
Marléne Shaw is a highly qualified and experienced counsellor, with many years experience in helping people from all walks of life.
